In our most introspective moments husbands may question just how good we are at the role. My friend Mark Riddle described the lack of rites of passage young people experience in our culture. I know. There are milestones – puberty, driver’s license, high school graduation, registering for the draft, and reaching the legal age. But these are not the same as rites of passage.
Tribal cultures understand the need to provide direction and affirmation to young men and women to signal the community is with them and confident they will become participants in a given culture/society. I have often likened it to the “atta boy” signal a Dad gives a son or the “you will be fine” a mother signals to her daughter.
Absent rites of passage boys and girls look for signals from respected adults, if not their parents, that they are doing well. When boys and girls fail to either distinguish these signs or to receive them, we often enter marriage with an acute need to know we are doing well in our new found roles.
Joshua Breland invited me to write for a website he started, Gospel Husbands. I confess to the feeling that gospel as an adjective sounds a lot like biblical, like we know what we are talking about – experts if you will. That could not be farther from the truth, even reality. But, in the same vein that John Frye considers Jesus the best model for pastor, Joshua believes the Way of Jesus is instructive for husbands. In that way, the site is intended to connect husbands to Jesus in a way that celebrates and encourages.
One of the first posts we were to contribute was, “Why Contribute to Gospel Husbands?” Here is a link to my piece. I begin my answer with,
Joshua asked. That is why I agreed to contribute to Gospel Husbands. Sure that sounds like a cop out. Let me explain.
Once on schedule, I will offer a post every Tuesday. Consider adding the RSS feed to your Google Reader or other blog reader platform. Interact. Ask questions. Make suggestions. I would hope the venture is more than a collaboration of writers, but also a place where readers become key contributors.